Judging

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On October 9th at 7:30 am Supertradmum passed from this world and faced the Lord in judgement. She will be missed by all that knew her. She was a brilliant writer and defender of the faith. Please pray for the repose of her soul.

Before she passed she gave me this and a few other posts. In her honor, I will publish them over the next several days.

Here is one on judging:

Recently, a friend of mine was in tears because her TLM community was shunning her. The reason for this mental expulsion from her group, with people repudiating her friendship for years and years, was that she decided to be a whistleblower against someone she knew was involved in a serious crime, a member of the TLM community. The friend of mine had found out about the crime from members of the family who were terrified of this man, who was and is very popular in the community.

She went to the police, as the family members were too afraid, and the police found much evidence to prove that this man was committing a serious crime. My friend decided to blow the whistle because children were involved. One family member begged her to get involved.

I would have done the same.

Now, the TLM group has turned against her, not believing in her, the police, or the verdict. There is a strange hatred of established authority among some TLMers.

Amazing.

I alone support her. Alone, and that is because I was a whistleblower years ago and lost many things, position, opportunities, success, because of those decisions.

Sometimes truth hurts.

Sometimes one has to experience a similar situation not to judge, as these members of this church are doing, taking the side of the criminal as he has them fooled.

Judging demands an open mind. It demands objectivity. Whistleblowers do not act out of anger or frustration, but for the sake of truth.

Most people want to stay in their own opinions and not explore both sides of an argument.

In 1973, I was working in the summer program of Head Start, a government program to help poor children get caught up for entrance to primary school. We on the staff were to teach basic skills to pre-schoolers and kindergarten age children who had no crayons, paper, pencils, even basic toys. We were to help them enter first grade at a level of competence found in middle and upper class children.

Part of my job was not only to teach, but pick up the children with a nurse in the morning, check out the children, and bring them to the Head Start school.

What we discovered changed my entire summer plans.

First of all, the majority of the children were black from the local ghetto area. When we went to get them to take them to school, we found out that, one, the children were wearing the same clothes all week and were very dirty. And, two, they were hungry.

So, our day started with washing the children and giving them clean clothes. We then bought them breakfast, which, at that time, was not provided by Head Start. Only then, would we try and teach them.

Finally, we decided to make more detailed visits of the homes and houses when we picked up the children in the van.

We discovered that some of the mothers, all at home, were in various stages of depression. One was drinking. We discovered the horrible poverty of these homes and the terrible state of the buildings, with many belonging to absentee landlords.

I remember one woman on one of the hot summer mornings sitting on the porch fanning herself and in a state of terrible depression. She would not even speak.

She had come up from the South and had no support group.

We went into the house to fetch the little boy who was enrolled in Head Start and looked around. Piles of clothes, dirty clothes, filled the laundry area. Of course, being of a middle class mind-set, I immediately blamed the lady on the front porch for negligence. However, when I found out that she did not have enough money to pay the water and electricity bills, and not enough money to buy soap, I began to understand poverty. Other women were in the same position, but threw-out the dirty clothes given to them as they had no means to wash them or hang them out to dry. Not all houses and apartments have yards or gardens.

But, it took me almost 40 years to understand their plight. Why? Because I was in the same position, that is, too poor to go to the laundry around the corner and too poor to buy soap. I had no way to wash clothes where I was living and let people give me clothes who offered. In this situation of no help with the washing, I remembered the lady on the porch with her fan and understood, so many years later, her depression. I did not get depressed, but I did cry at the fact that I could not stay as clean as I wanted and that after a while, I had to throw away a few clothes. I tried washing things in the sink, but most things did not dry and went ponging. The clothes became mouldy. That mother had given up. Thankfully, I had resources to get me out of that time of poverty. However, I am poor again, but with different problems. Recently, I remember the lady with the fan again.

We had our hand’s full with the children in 1973, but I hope one member of the team got this woman help. She was not alone in her plight.

Nor was I so many years later.

Those who have never experienced terrible poverty constantly judge those who do, as I did that lady with the fan so long ago. Some people simply do not have options. Even in a socialist state, many people fall between the cracks.

St. John Paul II understood this when he wrote and said that we had to give preferential treatment to the poor. This is not an option for Catholics, but a duty.

Some people do not understand that it is the duty of all Catholics to help the poor, not the State. That is how wealthier people get to heaven.

Christ reminded us of this duty many times.

As to whistleblowers, they are faced with a decision to hide the truth or share it, for the good of others.

Three times I had to be a whistleblower, and one had to do with reporting a man abusing a baby in the apartment next to us. I had my car windows broken for that one, someone taking revenge on me…but he was convicted and was a drug dealer to boot.

One had to do with sharing with a board that one of the members was extorting money from the Latin Mass school where I was principal. They refused to look into it, and I resigned, as did another teacher, and my secretary was fired, as we all knew the truth. We could not take the matter to court, as we did not have the evidence in hand, although we had seen it. Years later, some of the board came to the same conclusion, but none apologised to me. Maybe they were afraid of the man. I had to call the police as he began to stalk me. Thankfully, that ended, with a warning from the police.

The third time I shall not write out, and was the most serious.

My friend did a valiant and brave thing. Now, she has to leave her TLM community and to elsewhere for Mass. No one has asked to sit down and talk with her about her decision. No one wants to know the truth. No one wants to believe that a man who seems virtuous is not really. She received threatening phone calls from members of the TLM community. My friend is suffering for the truth and for protecting children.

I do not understand why people cannot talk about things instead of judging without the entire truth of a situation. Is it fear that their views may have to change?

I do not now. I do not judge. I only know that the habit of judgement in the TLM communities is strong and toxic. Judging is based on pride. Period.

JMJ, pray for us!

God is good,

Jay

2 comments on “Judging”

  1. Como posso não me emocionar! Como posso não reverenciar ao nosso Deus por ato tão importante em minha vida, que me faz ser melhor e me aproximar de Deus! Obrigada por ser testemunha de ato tão nobre.Que Deus esteja sempre com todos vocês! Que Deus abençoe a família.

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